Bitter

wish I'd known
in those first few days
what bloodshot eyes would
refuse to see
"I'd kill for another dose" he says
as if he would
it frightens me

agreement reached
it's locked up tight
but it calls to him
he wanders by night
in circles
back to stand before
the glorious bathroom cabinet door

I grin and bear, I hold his hand, I can hardly forgive, let alone understand
and for taking his bitter release away
"I hate you" he screams
"I love you" I say